I’m sure at some point in your life you have been teased, most likely when you were a child or maybe it was just yesterday (or it felt like it was just yesterday). Maybe it was on the playground, in the classroom, or in your own home. Someone found a “weak” spot and drew external attention to it, maybe repeatedly. In turn, the teaser derived some pleasure from the act and you were left with an internal wound that you have been carrying throughout your life. I have identified my internal wounds and most of them lead directly back to what could be considered “innocent” teasing.
It’s hard to distinguish what the teaser’s intentions were for finding my “spots”. When I reflect on my personal teasers, it was likely connected to some unidentified judgment they were having about themselves, linked to their own inner critic. Maybe they thought they’d toughen me up, or they thought it was funny, they received the attention they craved, which was linked to their own childhood wounds.
Teasing can be fun for some people and it can become a “sport”, a way of relating or not relating. But I think it’s an example of what’s wrong with our culture and a perpetuation of cruelty and it keeps the inner critic alive in each one of us generation after generation. The inner critic is that harsh internal voice that delivers messages like: you are unlovable, “bad”, ugly, fat, stupid, you do everything wrong, your too ….much, sensitive, loud, etc, etc. I have not meet a person that doesn’t have that deflating inner voice or hasn’t felt it’s wrath. It usually sounds like a particular person from your life (teacher, classmate, parent, sibling). For me it can be sneaky, it sometimes masquerades as my conscience, but it’s really the voice of toxic shame. From my experience, it has kept me from really living my life to the fullest, deflating me and ultimately holding me back.
I have had to do a lot of work to feel less impacted by my inner critic. I first had to realize it was NOT my voice! Second, I had to get to know it really well, enough to know what it’s message sounded like, what it felt like in my body, how it deflated me; in the words of Robert Masters, I had to “become intimate with it”. This was a painful process, but necessary! If I can distinguish it from my true conscience, I can find the internal power to fight it off whenever it shows up to “visit”. I discovered that in my life it has held all my power! The internalized teaser’s voice would ring in my head and keep me from doing a lot of things that I was BORN to do. It’s still shows up in my life, but now instead of getting crippled by the voice, I can say “My inner critic says I’m….” and it loses some of it’s power over me. I then have a choice to excuse it in whatever way will help me feel more of my power again.
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Observing my 4-year old daughter, I can’t help to think the inner critic might be a natural part of the human psyche, but it is directly fueled by external messages, both physical and energetic. She is the motivating factor in my life to gain my power back and release myself from the messages I received as a child, the chains of conditioning. Because under the control of the critic, it’s pretty darn easy for me to become the “teaser” and I don’t want her to feel powerless in this world!
Call me to find some freedom from your “teasers”.